Step Up Revolution Review

Step Up Revolution is another addition to this seemingly shallow and pointless series of dancing flicks. This time, its set in Miami. Woot.

Welcome to Miami where the players pl… no, that’s not it… where the douchebags roam and Natty Ice flows like water. We come to a scene where a dance crew, The Mob, pulls out the latest trend of flash mobs in the middle of Miami streets. Led by their good-looking leader, Sean (Ryan Guzman) and his best bro, Eddy (Misha Hamilton), they take the city by storm, planning these elaborate flash mob dances.

Most of the dances contain loud hip hop music while low-riders are bouncing in the background, girls are shakin’ they asses, and homeboys are throwin’ they hands up. It’s an all-around good time as The Mob tries to get their YouTube views up to 10 million hits and win $100,000. Which in retrospect isn’t THAT much money if you split it up with the 15-20 people involved in the process. All in all, you might bank about 6 grand, but that’s all right. Cash money, bro.

So as I was sayin’, our homeboy Sean (you remember him, right?) meets this smoking hot babe named Emily (Kathryn McKormick) at a beach club.

I’m sorry, I can’t keep doing this.

Anyway, Sean and Emily enjoy a very erotic (and don’t forget to mention public) dance with each other in the middle of the dance floor as everyone cheers them on. They really connect, but she glances over at what turns out to be her father (played by Peter Gallagher (and is also a Billy Bob Thornton looking mother-fucker)), and she runs off fairly quickly.

Emily is a classical dancer who is trying out for a very prestigious dance school. Her father doesn’t necessarily agree. He wants her to go to business school and help run his hotel business.

After reconnecting with Sean, Emily finds out about The Mob and she wants in. She thinks it will help bring character to her classical dancing, plus it gets time with Sean.

They do a quick mob or two, then things start to get serious. Emily’s father, let’s just call him Mr. Anderson, now wants to build a new hotel over the neighborhood where The Mob lives. Hurt by her father’s intentions, Emily goes to him and asks him to stop. He denies and she convinces The Mob to move on from art and try to protest the construction.

So they do so, and after some time, the rest of The Mob, besides Sean who already knew, finds out who she is. They cast her out as the bad guy and throw another mob addressing the fact that Mr. Anderson’s daughter is against her as they terrorize a fancy party he was throwing.

Sean, who had nothing to do with the terror mob, gets the blame from Emily and now it is up to him to get his crew back together and take their neighborhood back with one giant clusterfuck of a dance.

The whole premise of the movie is really dumb. I get the motivation to win the $100,000, but when split up over the amount of people involved you really don’t get as much as you’d like. Sure around 6 grand sounds pretty good, but realistically, you can’t do THAT much with that amount.

Most of the dances weren’t very great. The opening street mob was overdone and played out annoyingly. I can’t get into a bunch of girls squatting and shaking their asses while low-riders are bouncing in the back. It feels too much like a rap video.

Other dances were a boring skit in a restaurant, and a protest in a major business building, kind of taking a stab at Wall Street sort of thing.

There was one dance I enjoyed. It was an art museum setting. People were blended in with the artwork, then the lights go off and we get some cool laser effects to some hard electronic music. It was really a joy to watch.

Other than that, none of the flash mobs really impressed me. There were a couple times where Kathryn McKormick showed off her true dancing talents in some fairly emotional bits for her character.

What pissed me off most is the ending of this movie. Step Up Revolution has the stupidest dues ex machina I have ever seen. It’s not very subtle and it completely contradicts what they were fighting for in the first place. I can give you an example of how it goes (also, this may be KIND OF spoiler-ish, but be cautious):

“Hi, I am ______, and I would like to solve all your problems if you’d like to advertise for _______ Corporation”.

Give or take a few words are not there, but you get my drift. It‘s utter bullshit.

I guess if there is one thing really good that you can take from this, it would be the 3D. They did a good job incorporating that into not only the dances, but the street art as well. Seeing multiple panes of glass being layered and spray-painted looks really cool in 3D.

Other than that, Step Up Revolution is as worthless as the finger paint it was written with. There isn’t much that you can get from this UNLESS you are really into most types of dancing. If you like that, then you will get a kick out of this. Seeing today’s latest dance moves pulled off in 3D will really be a treat for you. For others skeptical about seeing it, save your money. It really isn’t worth it.

Step Up Revolution 3D – 5/10

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