What’s Your Number? Review

Mainstream romantic comedies are a dime a dozen. They almost always play out exactly as planned with very little room to differentiate from the crowd. I admit that I enjoy a few a year, but I try and keep my distance from the lazy genre because most of the studios are more worried more about getting a popular actor or actress in a quick buck film than an actual good one. Chris Evans is hot right now in the movie world with Captain America in the bag and The Avengers coming up and Anna Faris is in desperate need of another film she can ruin so why not make What’s Your Number? The cast is really odd here, with tons of cameos from guys like Andy Samberg, Zachary Quinto, Aziz Ansari and even Faris’s real life boyfriend Chris Pratt, but none of that amounts to anything. In the end What’s Your Number? is another wasted R rated romantic comedy that follows the same beats as the films of the past without ever stopping to try and inject a little flavor in it.

Ally Darling (Anna Faris) is a bit of a whore. She’s slept with 20 men and none of them managed to work out. She has no problem charming the guys into the sack, but she has some serious problems trying to establish a relationship or anything more than a one night stand. Her sister, Daisy (Ari Graynor), in getting married and this, along with an article from a magazine motivates Ally to find Mr. Right. Her across the hall-mate Colin (Chris Evans) shares the same sexual relationship status, but he takes pride in it whereas Ally finds shame in it.

Ally hires Colin to track down her ex-boyfriends in hope that she can find the right guy, again. I shouldn’t forget to mention Chris Pratt‘s character, Disgusting Donald. Donald was another reason for Ally’s sudden interest in trying to get committed. She runs into Donald while helping Daisy plan her wedding and Donald is far from disgusting. He’s a fit and respectable man who is getting married and this is partially why Ally decides to get her act together. A very un-entertaining flashback with Ally and Donald helps set the tone for this horrendous romantic film claiming to also be a comedy.

What’s Your Number? plays out exactly like you would expect, but without any emotional attempts. Instead of trying to get the viewer to side with Ally and her poor decisions director Mark Mylod paints Ally as a dumb, repulsive and generally unlikable person. Not once does a feeling of sympathy or sadness come across when Ally is down on her luck, instead you’ll feel like throwing up if you hear Anna Faris deliver another line of dialogue. I’m not sure how Anna Faris continues to get work in Hollywood because she has one of the most obnoxious voices. Each line is delivered with a high pitched squeak that resembles nails on a chalkboard.

Chris Evans does fine as the charming neighbor that starts out as an asshole, but slowly eases his way into being that sweet and considerate friend that’s looking for more. I don’t discredit Evans for switching things up after playing it more serious in Captain America and other films, but that doesn’t give him a complete pass from being so simple. He fits every stereotype in the book. He’s a struggling musician who’s all about staying true to yourself, yet he randomly decides to have a heart once he meets Ally.

The R rating doesn’t lend any favors to What’s Your Number?. The film is very light in the crude and raunchy humor department. There are a few brief moments of nudity, but I don’t think anything is really revealed. The only reason the film was tagged with the rating was because a few F bombs were dropped, but that’s it. I was more than willing to sit through a generic romantic comedy if the jokes were actually funny, but nothing really lands because of Faris’s awkward delivery and Evan’s lack of care.

The chemistry between the two leads is nowhere to be found, not at the beginning, middle or end. You never feel like their right for each other, even after the countless attempts of connection. I’m sorry, but late night rooftop dinner scenes aren’t going to help you when your characters are so lifeless.

What’s Your Number? could have worked if it had a pulse. Instead it’s just another entry in the stale romantic comedy genre. Anna Faris and Chris Evans don’t do much to heighten the film and none of the cameos are ever given more than 2 minutes to register as something funny. The film feels like a rushed attempt to capitalize on Chris Evans‘ sudden star power or one of those films that sat on the shelf for years and is now trying to take advantage of his name. I’m going to go with the latter, because a rushed R rated romantic comedy with Anna Faris doesn’t really sound like a money maker to me. There’s no romance or comedy to be had in What’s Your Number? which leaves you with absolutely nothing.

What’s Your Number? – 5/10

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